he was just under the influence as usual。 。 。 。V at theNYU bookstore on Washington Place; asking
if they had any school logo T…shirts in black instead of their trademark purple。 Not exactly the
school spirit;V ! 。 。 。K andI shopping for their back…to…school wardrobes atTSE; buying armloads
of cashmere sweaters?even though they?re going to school in Florida? Well; cashmereis nice over
a bikini。 。 。 。C at theShake Shack in Madison Square Park; chomping down on a cheeseburger and
feeding that spoiled little white monkey of his French fries with extra ketchup。 I wonder if they get
cited for health code violations。 If so; we?ll know why。
It?s time to watch someLaguna Beach reruns?gotta love to hate those ridiculous nouveau riche
kids?before I skip out for my manipedi appointment at Elizabeth Arden Red Door Spa。 Nothing
like buffing up and staying silky smooth for the dog days of summer?not to mention the devilishly
handsome French waiters at Pastis。 。 。 。 Down; boys!
Vouz m?adorez; ne dites pas le contraire;
gossipgirl
TO: undisclosed…recipients
FROM: jeanieinabottle119@yahoo。
Subject: Dan?s gay?hooray!
Dear recent graduates of Riverside Prep: I hope you don?t mind my abusing your school
yearbook?s contact list; but I?m sure you?ll be happy when you find out why: I?m writing to
invite you all to a momentous occasion; the ing…out party for your dear classmate and my dear
son; Daniel Jonah Humphrey。 After four years of going to school with Dan; I?m sure you?ve all
been waiting for this big day!
Please be our guests in apartment #9D; 815 West End Ave。; this Saturday (tomorrow!) at 2 p。m。
Food and drink will be served; and it?s sure to be a merry time。 But hush…hush?it?s asurprise !
Whatever you do; don?t tell Daniel!
Hope to see you all on Saturday! Please dress your colorful best for the occasion。
Love and rainbows;
Jeanette (Daniel?s mom)
TO: svanderwoodsen@constancebillard。edu
FROM: kenthemogul@gmail。
Subject: Get ready for your close…up 。 。 。
。 。 。 because it?s showtime!
Due to the fact that even the fuckhead critics love my film; the release date forBAF has been
moved up to September。 Sweetheart; you are about to be astar ; thanks to me。
That freakworm Bailey Winter is probably peeing himself trying to sew you a choice of couture
gowns for the NYC premier next month; lucky girl。 You?ll have to wear your own clothes to the
press conference; though。 You and that queen Thad are scheduled to do press this Tuesday at 5 p。m。
in one of those tacky penthouses at SoHo House。 Don?t worry; I?ll handle all the questions?I just